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Nothing Is Scary Anymore Except Real Life Part 5: Salem

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Witch House...I Guess   Ask any author what the best part about putting out a book with an independent publisher is and they’ll all say the same thing: begging bookstores and venues to allow you to read from your book. Nothing is quite as humbling as being ghosted by Twiddle Shit’s Book Barn in Nowhere, Iowa. Yet, I persevere. With a new book out, my goal was to read in cities I had never read in before. I was able to book a quick 3-day tour to the East coast starting Providence, RI, then on to Boston, and ending in Manchester, NH. Once again Paris, Tokyo, and Barcelona would have to wait. Originally, I was planning on taking trains between cities but after a summer of work-related travel, I was in no mood to sort all that out. Once I made the decision to rent a car, I mapped out all of my routes. I would fly into Boston and spend the first night in Providence followed by a couple of nights in Boston. All of my shows were booked for the evening so I’d have a lot of free time before...
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2 Hours in Venice Beach

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Hey Gang! Here’s a lil' something about Venice Beach. My phone was on its last leg and it had a battery that lost its charge faster than you could say, “Damn this phone sucks”. There are not as many photos as I would’ve liked but thems the breaks. Enjoy! The amount of time I’ve spent in Los Angeles is criminally low. I don’t know why, I guess I just haven’t had many reasons to go. Most likely it’s because it is an intimidating city to visit. I’m from Chicago which is a city made up of neighborhoods. Los Angeles is a city made up of cities and it goes on forever. For example, when I found out I was going, I contacted my friend Derrick Brown who offered to let me stay at his place. He stayed in Burbank and hanging out in an actual neighborhood seemed like a great way to experience the city. It seemed that way until I learned it would take about an hour and a half in a $100 Lyft to get there Dearest reader, I am nothing if not cheap so when the client I was working for offered to boo...
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Kansas City 2023

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  We’re back! Quick note before you read, there are not as many pictures as usual. I had an update that removed a bunch of pictures. They were probably blurry anyway. This is the first of a few I will be dropping this month and then I’ll be back on a regular basis. For most of my life, I didn’t think much about Kansas City. It was never the backdrop for movies or television shows. It didn’t have any natural wonders or impressive architecture. The only thing I associated Kansas City with was having the ugliest uniforms in professional sports. The Royals look like a Dodgers knockoff. The Chiefs' ketchup and mustard uniforms look like something the nerd in an 80s teen movie would wear to his job at the food court hot dog stand.  I realize uniform choice is an unfair way to judge an entire city so when I had the chance to spend a couple of days working in schools around Kansas City, I was excited. Most of the folks I’ve met from KC were not assholes and they spoke highly of their ...
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Nothing is Scary Anymore Except Real Life Part 4: Eastern State Penitentiary

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  Before the end times were upon us, I was walking around Copenhagen with my friend Peter. Peter grew up in Copenhagen and he knew I liked old stuff. He pointed out his university and informed me that when he was attending they celebrated their 800th birthday. For someone like myself who loves old cities, that’s a flex. I’m a sucker for a cobblestone street or a cafe with paneling made from a kind of oak that has long gone extinct. Narrow walkways, gas lamps, gimme all that shit.  Why do I like old cities? Because I grew up next to Chicago and nothing is allowed to get old in Chicago. The mayors have torn down countless historic buildings like chubby, little Godzillas in 3 piece suits. Developers are transforming classic brick facades into modernist abominations best described as “gentrification chic”. Shit, they couldn’t even leave the Chicago River alone. They looked at it and were like, “Naw son, let’s make it go the other way.” Add in the fact that Chicago is a relatively ...
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